The wait finally ends.
The obscurity fades...
And thus emerges the dawn-
The one most venerated
Loved and desired.
What stays back is the past.
With the resonating feel,
That lingering touch
And that gentle caress.
Dead but resounding.
Barren but fulfilling.
Lost but not detached...
[Dedicated to the year that was...]
If you stood by a busy road with hands dug deep into your pockets, you would see the world whiz past you. Fast. Very fast.
The motion might even seem intimidating for its comprehension may not seem plausible. You might want to see how it feels like to be on the other side of the road but the relocation again will be a much hindered one, if at all. Undertaking the risk might also not seem to be a very receptive option. And you stay back. Just where you were. Looking at the world whiz past you. Fast. Very fast.
If you tried reasoning out as to why you can’t help but wait for the world to slow down, you would find yourself in an uncertain state mostly with no answers. And if you managed to seek the answers somehow, they wouldn’t be definite.
You’ll be told- “that’s how things are…that’s how they always have been…”
And ironically you have the freedom to choose to either accept this established proposition or reject it. More often than not established propositions are further strengthened by our meek acceptance for defiance though attractive is not a very easy-treaded path.
If you stood by a busy road you would also want to know where everything is headed to and why this urgency to reach there as soon as possible. And if you on the contrary do not know where you are headed it might bother you. The botheration might consume you day after day, month after month, year after year till it makes you hollow. A scary state of affairs.
But if you stood by a busy road you would also notice that this is not where you were destined to be. You are just on your way to get to some place. Anywhere. And this is not your settled position. This is not what you have been waiting for, where you’ve wanted to be. You’re still on your way. The journey is not yet over and maybe the time has not yet come…
Every girl practically dreams of this day. She hopes. She waits. She wishes.
So what is it like when "the guy" finally takes your hands in his, looks into your eyes, draws you closer and says...
I never knew this would happen to me. And this fast. Sometimes you are so surprised you don't know how to react and sometimes you are just so beyond surprised you simply don't react. I'm not sure if I should use the word 'embarrassed' but that's just how I felt. I could feel my cheeks going beyond a blushed-pink. I'm sure they must be red. An embarrassed red. And my eyes must have surely betrayed me. I'm not sure...
Well the toughest part is to withdraw your hands (the ones he's clutching tightly). Actually no, the toughest part is to look away. Something, I was pining to do and which I eventually managed to.
The guy had chosen just the right time. There were fireworks, some soft music behind (which I just can't seem to recall), the beautifully illuminated college campus and a crowd which didn't care who was in love with whom. They preferred to leave us alone. Not a much desired state if you ask me. I'd never felt more uncomfortable than this. Well...finally the official proposal was over. The guy was done with his going-down-on-my-knees-for you. Thankfully.
And who so ever thought getting proposed by someone is a dream come true let me tell you darlings, there's more than that. Trust me.
You actually have to give the poor chap an answer. That is a 'yes' or a 'no'. And that's the worst part of it. Lame and cliché excuses like I-err-need-err-some-err-time won't do. And the look 'this guy' had on his face, I'm sure he would have either killed himself or me if I dared say anything like that.
So how I actually wriggled out of the mess is a story in itself but what's worrying me is I someday have to come up with an answer. And that'll hurt. I don't know what lies ahead.
But hey getting proposed ain`t that bad. And the best part was,
"Take your time...think over it..."
And after I had just managed to blink and steal in some air,
