Every time I'm perturbed because of what others said or did, my mom asks me to calm down and to try and flush it out of my system. I cannot begin to explain how difficult that becomes at times.

It is easier said than done. When our friends seem to be climbing the success ladder faster than us, it does bother the inner self. No, its not being envious. It essentially is not a negative feeling. But it evokes a sense of urgency, a fear of being left behind. And that in a way seems to be instinctive. Blame the society, blame the modern age or blame yourself; you cannot run away from it. Let's face it, we do get affected!

In all these complexities of life, we in a way forget to ask ourselves, what had we actually set out for? It actually becomes difficult to recall what exactly was the sole purpose of it all. After series of adaptations and alterations, the original seems to be lost far behind. And that is sad. What is worse is that after being caught in a mindless struggle for the supreme position, we don't even bother anymore about things which should be primary; for instance love, friendship and commitments.
This sort of creates a loop again. These questions of shoulds and musts are in a way directives to conformity. These again are assembled on the pillars of societal notions. It's like we are stuck in this loop. Moving from one point to another in circles. Basically not getting anywhere.

This age we live in again, is not very accepting. Neither is it inclusive. Either you fit in, force in or be left out. We are again tending towards the jungle rule.
Caught in between the inner and outer self, it becomes difficult to choose between x and y. How do you devise your modus operandi ? And given the above premise, what should a generic protocol be? Should it be conforming or non-conforming?

What's your call?

One day when we’ll be old, we’ll walk ourselves to an empty bench in the park right outside our home to soak in the drifting afternoon sun as the clouds wander up above in the sky.

I will place my head on your shoulders and you will gently clasp my hands. I’ll pretend to look at you while I look at all those years in between us. In absolute sequence, I’ll make myself walk down all the ages spent together, sitting there with you.

I will point out to you some bits and pieces of our lives. You will laugh at some, smile at some and tease me ‘bout the others. I’ll smile along.

And as we soak in the warmth of our togetherness, we will have too many memories to recollect and too many things to put a tick against. We will call ourselves rash for some, brave for some, foolish for some and crazy for the others.

I believe the crazy parts will surely outdo the others. I don’t think we’ll be wise. We have set out to be unwise, haven’t we love?

Like photographs arranged together to recreate the past times, I’ll lay down before you all our factions. Each one of them which we shared together. You’ll do the same. And thus there in that moment, we will have recreated our lives. Piece by piece, layer upon layer, memory after memory…

I wonder if we’ll still need to tell each other how much he or she is loved. I have been told that with love and with companionship, words cease to serve themselves as useful. The customary by and large takes over. But I think, I’ll still hold your arm and while we help ourselves walk back home and whilst you make sure I’m fine, I’ll silently whisper into your ears the words which will have become by then the meaning of life - the soul of our eternity.
I love you.